Last year I started practicing yoga to try to curb my severe anxiety.
It helped so much that I practiced daily, joined a studio, bought a good quality mat, took a subscription to a yoga magazine. I was hooked.
This Spring I got sick, then I got really sick and ended up with pneumonia. Then when I was on the mend with that I fell while holding The Girl and further injured my arm/shoulder which had been mildly sore for a few months.
My anxiety had slowly started becoming worse, and by the time I was feeling ok enough to resume practicing (about 2 months after first getting sick) I hit a metaphorical wall so hard that even contemplating going to class sent me into a panic attack and crying.
So I stepped back, requested a medical leave from the studio and tried to focus on walking and other forms of exercising. Maybe my time with yoga was done?
We recently took a holiday to the island and I spent as much time as I could barefoot by the water.
I saw the sunrise most mornings and enjoyed the calm of the water.
And I thought that maybe I wanted to go back to yoga.
This morning I practiced for the first time in about 4 months.
It wasn't a long practice. Some moves didn't feel too great, and I have lost a lot of flexibility.
My arm ached a bit. But I did it. And I'll do it again tomorrow, and the next day, and so on.
I'm aiming of 40 days of yoga to get back into my practice and start feeling better again. I placed the rocks and stones that I had collected on one of my island walks when I was thinking about yoga with my mat to remind me of how much I wanted to start up again. I added a sand dollar because I love them so much.
Not sure these grounding items will stay the same, but it's another thing I'd like to add to my practice.
I'm nervous, I'm excited, I'm hoping to really do this.